Introduction
Confidence is key to success in life. If you don’t believe in yourself, it will be hard for others to have any belief in you. Unfortunately, many people struggle with low self-confidence, low self-worth, stress, and insecurity. It challenges one’s ability to be gain confidence, be positive, and own one’s powers. It will also hold anyone back from achieving their goals and dreams, but it doesn’t have to be this way. With these simple strategies, you can build your confidence and become your best self. This article will address why you lack confidence and the best ways to boost your confidence while becoming your best self.
What does it mean to have confidence?
Confidence is a trait that most people want and everyone needs. Self-confident people can believe in themselves and their abilities and acknowledge their limits. For example, you might be confident when preparing for a public speaking gig because you feel like you have the talent to pull it off. However, that doesn’t mean you have confidence in your cooking skills.
Think of it this way: you are only as good as your bad days. If you’re feeling confident, then life is great! On the other hand, if you’re not feeling so good about yourself, then something terrible may happen to drag you down even more. Those emotions of doubt can challenge you and cause unwanted stress and a lack of confidence. A person with high confidence has an unshakeable self-belief. They recognize that bad days happen and some situations are out of their control, but it does not cause their confidence levels to decrease. Their ability to control their emotions and belief in themselves is key to their confidence. Having this type of self-confidence helps when one is facing an unpleasant situation and questions their own ability. A self-confident person believes “this too shall pass” and works hard to check their emotions. That belief and knowledge of life allow them to remain steadfast when things are difficult and preserve toward their goals. A self-confident person understands that this is incredibly important in reaching goals and living how they want.
Identify your insecurities
Before you can build your confidence, it is vital to recognize why you are currently afraid of not living up to others’ expectations and lack self-confidence. Low self-confidence is correlated with fear. Negative self-talk, lacking confidence in one’s ability, and self-doubt contributes to a lack of confidence. Once you realize your insecurities, you can start building a sense of self-worth and self-esteem and begin to have a strong sense of self. It involves a lot of self-reflection, meditation, and positive affirmations to build self-confidence and start seeing yourself in a new light. Most people may skip this step because they’d rather pretend or ignore any of their insecurities.
The more you are aware of your insecurities, the less power they will have over you, making it easier to develop self-confidence. It will be an uncomfortable process because you are facing yourself—deep diving and looking at what things have unconscious control of you. You will question your self-efficacy, faith, and abilities. However, that is a part of the deep dive process, and it’s necessary. Becoming aware of your insecurities is a step towards gaining self-confidence.
To identify and remove those insecurities, you should ask yourself the following questions:
- What is the source of my feelings of insecurities?
- What type of language do I currently use when addressing myself?
- How do I currently cope with my insecurities?
- How have my insecurities affected my confidence, both positively and negatively?
- Finally, why do I need to face and remove these insecurities?
The above questions will help you get a general sense of why you are currently experiencing insecurities. However, when reading over the questions, really dig deep and answer them honestly. Being vague won’t help you; as a matter of fact, being vague will only hinder you more because you are choosing not to face what is holding you back. When identifying your insecurities, you must be brutally honest with yourself so that you can heal and begin to build the confidence you need to live as you desire.
Work on building a sense of self-worth and self-esteem
One way to reduce self-doubt and increase faith would be to create a sense of self-worth and self-esteem. By working on these two characteristics, you can better relate with others when in social situations. Therefore, it is crucial not only for being more confident but also for personal development.
Self-worth is defined as a person’s overall evaluation or judgment of worth. It is how we choose to look at ourselves and our abilities. We either think highly of ourselves because we know our strengths and weaknesses and accept them or think harshly of ourselves because we only see our faults and inadequacies and focus on them. Self-esteem is how much we like ourselves; it is our opinion, an attitude towards our existence based on our standards. How good we feel about ourselves should depend on what we think and how well we respect and care for ourselves.
One way to build a sense of self-worth and self-esteem is to identify our strengths and weaknesses. Everyone has both; however, each person’s strength may be another’s weakness. Recognizing your strengths and working on them will help you develop more confidence. In addition, being aware of your weak points enables you to understand how to work around them when in social situations.
Practice Positive Affirmations & Visualization
One way to start building confidence is to practice positive affirmations. These are statements that you say to yourself, in the mirror or quietly, that help you start seeing yourself in a new light. Repeating positive affirmations can help you change your self-image and boost your confidence.
Some examples of positive affirmations are: “I am valuable,” “I am loved,” “I am capable,” and “I am worthy of all the good in life.” Of course, you can develop your own affirmations or use ones that resonate with you. However, it’s essential that the affirmations feel true for you and you believe them.
When you practice positive affirmations, please focus on your feelings when you say them to yourself. It’s not enough to repeat the words; it will be challenging to boost your confidence if the affirmations feel inauthentic.
Visualization
Another way of building confidence is through visualization. It means closing your eyes and imagining yourself in the future, accomplishing something that you desire. Before anything ever happens, it is first seen in the mind. Visualization is a key step to creating and manifesting. It is something everyone has the power to do, but usually, people are visualizing what they don’t want instead of what they desire.
You can visualize yourself succeeding in many scenarios, like buying a new car, getting a promotion at work, or successfully building a business. Visualizing these things will help you to believe that they are possible. It will be easier to take risks and try new things when you think something is likely because you won’t be afraid of failure.
If you want to get the most out of visualization, it’s crucial to create vivid images in your mind. Imagine as many details as possible and see them clearly in your mind.
Building confidence is ultimately about seeing yourself more positively and appreciating what is unique and exceptional about you.
Positive affirmations- “I am valuable,” “I am loved,” “I am capable,” and “I am worthy of all the good in life.” Visualization- closing your eyes and imagining yourself in the future, accomplishing something you desire.
Start living authentically by being true to who you are, not what others want from you.
When you start living authentically by being true to who you are, not what others want from you, you’ll find that you’re more content with yourself. You’ll no longer be trying to be someone you’re not, and you’ll be able to focus on your strengths and weaknesses honestly. It will also allow you to build genuine relationships with the people around you, as they will appreciate the real you.
That is why confidence is so important. It enables you to showcase the real you; not you, your low confidence coaxes you into being, but the authentic you. You are putting effort into your ideal for your life and living up to your set standard. That’s living authentically! Not asking permission to be and live as you desire, but having the high self-confidence to know you can be who you wish and live as you choose. It’s owning one’s power and creating future outcomes.
Find ways to be productive without feeling guilty about it, even if it doesn’t seem as important as other tasks.
When it comes to feeling guilty about productivity, sometimes the guilt comes from not doing more important things. Other times, the guilt comes from not being productive enough in general. But, no matter the source of the blame, there are ways to be effective without feeling guilty.
One way to do this is to focus on completing small tasks instead of big ones. Breaking down a big job into smaller parts makes it feel less daunting, and it’s easier to feel productive when you’re checking things off a list. You can also try working on tasks that you enjoy, even if they’re not as important as other things. It will help you feel good about yourself and make you more productive. Finally, if you can’t stop feeling guilty about being productive, try stepping back and asking yourself if the task is vital or just a habit. If it’s a habit, then see if there’s an easier way to do it that doesn’t make you feel guilty after it’s completed.
Being productive equates to action. Confidence is spearheaded with action. When a person begins to take action, their confidence begins to expand. That’s why it is so essential that you are productive. Again, refer back to the affirmations and visualization section. Being productive, coupled with affirmations and visualizations, will significantly impact your life.
Be kinder to yourself by accepting that everyone makes mistakes and is imperfect, just like you are
We are our own harshest critic. We often find it difficult to forgive ourselves for our mistakes, and we are constantly putting ourselves down. It can lead to a lack of confidence and low self-esteem. However, if we can be kinder to ourselves by accepting that everyone makes mistakes and is perfect just like we are, we can learn to forgive ourselves and build our confidence. We are all on our unique paths to self-discovery and experiencing many different things. Sometimes this will lead us into dangerous, tricky, or unpleasant circumstances that aren’t ideal for us. However, instead of continually blaming ourselves for getting lost, we can remember that life is an adventure full of unexpected twists and turns, both good and bad. We need to take everything that happens with a “grain of salt” and remember that the more experience we gain, the better we will become at knowing where to go.
Don’t compare yourself with others – we all have our struggles and triumphs!
Do not compare yourself with others. You will feel alone if you do this, and that is no way to live.
Acknowledge the good in yourself – don’t ignore it! However, comparing yourself will cause you to question if your good is good enough. The answer is yes, there is no high or low score on good. Any good you do is important and relevant. Celebrate it!
When someone does something better than you or receives more attention, it is easy to feel insecure. But you have to remember that everyone has different talents, so being yourself makes you unique! Work hard at improving talents and skills that are important to you.
Comparing yourself to others will only bring you down, and that’s not confidence. So instead of looking at someone else’s life as better than your own, see what you can learn from them! Learning from others, instead of comparing yourself shows maturity, emotional intelligence, and one’s willingness to grow and learn.
Start small by doing things that make you feel confident such as smiling or getting rid of negative people. Once you start feeling good about yourself, you can build on that. Treat yourself when you do something right and don’t put yourself down in front of others. Self-criticism is not the answer, and negative self-talk will not help you gain confidence. Instead, embrace that you did it and give yourself grace and a “high-five!”
Stay Positive
I believe that you are continually growing, so be nice to yourself first!
If you have grown up thinking bad things about yourself, it’s time for a change. Negative words from parents and peers are usually the culprit of negative thinking. Don’t let the mean comments other people say get to you. If they can’t accept who you are, they aren’t worth your tears. If you are using negative self-talk, telling yourself that you’re not good enough and that you’ll never achieve your goals, then those thoughts will become a reality. The problem is that this becomes a cycle. If you are not careful, you will pass it down to future generations.
Here’s what you need to start as of this moment:
- Be kind to yourself and always strive to be the best you can be. You set the standard. The goal is for YOU to be self-assured and have faith in yourself.
- Start believing in yourself now. The present moment is a gift and shouldn’t be wasted with any talk or belief that you are not worthy.
- Put distance between you and any influences that negatively impact your thinking and self-confidence. It means people, places, activities, etc. that are not uplifting or positive mental feedback.
- Create a safe space for you. Dr. Maya Angelou talked about having a space just for you, and no one else is allowed to enter. A place of reflection and solace.
- Be optimistic. Have a positive outlook on life always. Always remember, you are in control.
Interestingly, if you think positively about your future and how far you want to go in life, your self-esteem will rise as well! It is one skill that you have to master to win in the confidence game. With positive thinking comes positive results. Understanding this small but essential fact will set your life on a new trajectory. It will open you up to new experiences, new belief systems, and a sense of ownership of one’s powers.
Remember Your Accomplishments
Often we tend to focus more intensely on our shortcomings, which only serves to tear us down. Instead, make a list of your accomplishments and think of the positive feelings you had when you made them happen. You’ll soon realize that there are many things you have done right in your life. Something that you may not have known was possible for you, but you did it anyway. Reflect on those times. That’s why a list of your accomplishments is so important. Then, when you begin to have those doubtful moments, and you will, you will be able to look at this list and remind yourself what you are capable of accomplishing.
On the flip side, if you haven’t accomplished anything yet, you can start now. Start a list of what you would like to achieve and begin to feel the emotions associated with reaching that goal. It’s not too late. I don’t believe it is ever too late to become. That’s what confidence does to you; it lights the fire for you to become. It also illuminates the fire of possibility. Your accomplishments merely remind you of your capabilities and how confidence can bring those talents forward.
Conclusion
Confidence is something that everybody wants, but very few people are willing to put forth the work necessary to have. If you wish to be confident, you’ll have to go through a process. Your journey towards confidence will not be short, nor will it be easy. However, you have no chance of success without a vision for yourself. Assuming you have a long-term goal that is reasonable and achievable by you. If so, you’re already ahead of most people who aren’t sure where they want to go in life.
Now, it’s time to look at yourself and figure out what areas of your life need adjustment. What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses? How can these be used to build confidence to be the person you desire? Of course, nobody is perfect, so nobody will ever be confident in everything they do. However, even if you are not confident in one or more areas, you become a more well-rounded person if you are confident in enough places.
So being aware of your strengths and weaknesses is the first step towards becoming confident. Now it’s time to focus on what we need to do to improve in certain areas so that when we move on, we can take an honest look at ourselves and see how confident we are in ourselves. When most people give up after realizing they aren’t perfect, you understand: You can be confident in anything if you put your mind to it. So keep pushing forward because everyone felt as if they couldn’t keep going at one point in time.
If you are committed to improving yourself, you are on your way to being confident. Start taking steps toward living the life you want to live. Find people functioning in their lives as you would like to operate in yours and apply their techniques to your life. You won’t be confident in everything, especially initially, but keep going. Life favors those who are brave—those who boldly live a life of their choosing.
